In my opinion, the middle of the day is the perfect time to go to gym. Unlike after work when everybody and their brother is there, during the day there's no waiting around for machines, no alternating sets with strangers, and no creepy old men oogling over you the whole time. (Okay, so maybe that's not so true...the creepy old men seem to always be there).
But anyways, my trip to the gym today still has me laughing in absolute amazement, so I figured I should share.
After signing in and what not, I walked into the gym to notice that only one lone guy was there. Perfect I thought. Just how I like it. I hopped on the treadmill and was just getting up to speed when I realized my theme music wasn't playing in my headphones for some reason (and by theme music I mean any and every man-hating song currently out there). So I looked down at my Ipod to see what was the matter..."Low Battery: Connect to Power"...Awesome, just what I wanted to see. Looks like I'll be working out to the voices in my head today instead :(
So after finally accepting the fact that I would be running in silence for the next 45 minutes, I heard it for the first time...the loudest, most obnoxious moan I've ever heard. As most of you already know I am kind of a gym rat, so this certainly isn't the first time I've heard a guy grunt and moan at the gym, but let me tell you...I've never heard anything like this before.
At first I thought maybe I was just hearing things, but after that, he didn't stop. Not just expressing himself verbally on the last, most difficult rep like most guys...Nope, every rep of every set; coming up with a new, different pitched, even-worse-than-the-last moan each time. And without my beloved Ipod, I had no choice but to listen to each and every agonizing one of them; half laughing out loud, half looking around in shock wondering if this was all really happening.
Bench press, pull ups, even sit ups (yeah imagine that)...he had a noise for them all. I swear, if I would've closed my eyes for even one second I would've thought I was back in college laying in the bottom bunk while my roommate banged out yet another random dude right above me.
Seriously man, is that really necessary? Do you really feel the need to draw attention to your super human strength? Honestly, my arms are bigger than yours dude. Maybe you are just trying to show off, but come on, you just look
So guys, if you are reading this, please please please take note. Moaning at the gym...not sexy, and quite frankly, extremely inappropriate. I'm not sure if anyone has told you, but you are not an animal in the wild. From now on it would be really appreciated if you would save those noises for the bedroom where they belong.
Quote of the day: "We understand that ugliness and fatness are genetic disorders, much like baldness or necrophilia, and it's only your fault if you don't hate yourself enough to do something about it. Here at Globo Gym we can turn that Frankenstein you see in the mirror every morning into a Franken-fine! " ~ White Goodman; Dodgeball
1 comment:
Wish I could wear p.js to work:( THANKS for the following!!! Check out my blog, I am doing my first ever give away!
Post a Comment